Friday, July 24, 2009

We're alive

So I've been trying to write out Alexavier's birth story but every time I come over here to do it I get upset, angry, or my mind goes in a million different places. I just can't seem to get it all out the way I want to.

Here's a quick version.
Sunday July 19, 2009 one day before my schedualed Csection my water started leaking around 2pm. I went to the hospital and had an emergency Csection with Alexavier being born at 5:33pm. My doctor was out of town and not present for the birth. That was big bummer #1 for me. Then the epi took 4 tries to get it in. I was so doped up I don't remember a lot of things.

On the plus side Alexavier and I are fine. My birthing photographer made it there about 20 minutes after I got wheeled into recovery so I have some pictures to help jog my memory.

Another up is if I decide to have more children my Dr. is more than willing to do a VBAC. My luck he wont be here when I'm ready for another child!

Alexavier is doing good we are getting the hang of nursing. He hasn't gotten back up to his birth weight yet so I'm not looking forward to his appointment on Aug 4th. His pedi seems pretty understanding/tolorent of breastfeeding so hopefully he'll encourage me to keep going. I also think A has reflux so maybe they will diagnose that and it'll help get his birth weight back up as well.


Jeramyah is loving brother. Any time I don't have him in my arms he asks "Where's my brother?!" He's really gentle with him as well.
Nursing is going well - it was a big concern of mine. I'm not pumping like I should which I know I'll end up regretting but I just can't seem to make myself do it more.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

The last week or so...

Well I went for my version on July 13. It did not work. Baby did not turn. I went to the chiropractor on Wednesday...still didn't turn. I did ice pack at the top of my belly and heating pad at the bottom...felt him turn a bit. Thursday when I wake up I can tell he had moved over (his head was on my left upper side and then it was in the middle) but it was hard to tell if I was feeling butt or head.

Today I went to the doctor and the nurse said just by feeling she thought he was head up still. So we are keeping my Csection for the 20th.

I'm such a mix of emotions...part of me is so excited to know my baby boy will be here soon, it's kind of neat knowing that he will be here early Monday afternoon. When I was in labor the last thing on my mind was "MY BABY IS ABOUT TO BE HERE!" I'm still really bummed that I have to have the Csection. It is something I really didn't want. However my Dr. said since I'm not having any complications other than the breech he thinks I'm a great candidate for a VBAC. That makes me feel a lot better.

So I'm spending this week trying to relax and get last minute stuff done at the same time. I don't seem to be doing either one too well unfortunately!! This week has been busy but it's not with anything I should be doing...Plus with the heat I don't want to do anything either...

Anyway back to the version. I had a lot of questions/concerns regarding the epidural they suggest you get with it. I didn't get one and I have to say I wish I would have. Not for the pain reasons (it did hurt though! I had 2 big bruises for a little over a week!) but for relaxation...I felt myself tense up a lot more than once and I'm sure it didn't help the cause any. Dr doesn't think it would have helped me much - he was pretty stubborn - however I think I could have gone longer if I wasn't in such pain. So if anyone ever needs an EVC done and that is one of their questions I suggest they get it!

I made a ring sling last night. A friend of mine let me borrow hers to use as well. When I was making mine J asked what I was doing and told him making a sling. He said "For brother?" in an exasperated sounding voice. So I got the sling my friend lent me and put his baby doll in it and tied it around him. It was so cute he walked around supporting the baby's head and singing and swinging with him. I really think J is going to be a great big brother! I think he's ready for baby brother to get here as well!!!

We have picked out a name for baby but I am afraid to let anyone know until the baby gets here. My dr is out of town for the week and I'm afraid if I say the name out loud then he'll decide it's time for him to come. =)

Well I plan on taking my laptop to the hospital with me and will update ASAP...

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Whats your weight in love?

Most of you probably know I posted an online "pool" where you can guess the due date, weight, length, and sex of the baby. Today we asked Jeramyah when baby was going to be here he said "Sunday"
I said "Sunday as in today or next Sunday?"
"Next Sunday."
Then I asked him how much the baby was going to weight. First he said 12 and I said "okay 12oz how many pounds?". He said 1 first then he said 4. I asked "4lbs are you sure?" He said "4 little pounds of love!"

Thought that was super cute!!! =)Just for background - we tell J all the time that he's 41 lbs of pure love and that's probably where he got it from.


We went and fed the ducks today. James was eating some of the bread and it was making Jeramyah mad. He told James "You no eat it its for the ducks!!!" James kept eating and Jeramyah said "NO eat it daddy. Here let me show you!" He then takes the bread out of James' hand, turns around towards the water and says "You throw it like this. SEE!"

Ah...I love that child! =)

Thursday, July 2, 2009

What a scare!

This morning I had the biggest scare of my life (up to date).

Every morning before Jeramyah crawls into bed with me I wake up to the sound of his little feet running across the house to our room. Well this morning when I heard it I looked at the clock and then noticed the bathroom light was still on (from James getting ready for work) so after a minute of not feeling J come to bed I thought maybe James was running late and he was just stomping through the house. I close my eyes for a minute and something makes me get up.

I walk into the living room and notice the front door is open about a foot. I walk to it and say Jeramyah's name. I notice a lady walking across the street so I turn around to go get some pants (I'm just in a tshirt) I take the extra few steps across the hall to see if J's in his bed and if maybe James left the door open while starting his car. I don't see J so I panic I turn around to get pants and go check outside when I see J standing at the door.

The poor kid is crying and shaking so hard! When he sees me he runs to me and I pick him up, I have NEVER felt that child hold on to me so closely. I set down with him and ask him why he was outside and he can't even talk he's crying so hard. I have never seen him this way. I finally get a broken sentence out of him between hiccups and cries "daddy can't go to work".

I tell him "Yes, daddy went to work. Why were you outside?"
"The bugs were getting me." (again between hiccups and crying)
"Baby you can't go outside unless momma or daddy is with you"
More heavy crying.

I finally get him calmed down so I call James and leave him a message telling him what happened and that we need to keep an eye on him more and make sure we always lock the door. I then get J something to drink and change his diaper. I pull him close and we snuggle in bed with the light on for a bit. James calls about that time and I tell him again what all happened (in a bit more detail).

I had been scared but I didn't loose my cool up until this point. I guess saying it out loud to James I realized exactly what all could have happened. I start crying so hard. We talk for a bit then I let J talk to him for a minute. When I get off the phone Jeramyah asks "You scared?"
"Yes baby"
"About what?" I take just a second to think on how to word this and he says "The bugs scary?" About this time tears start to well up in his eyes again.
"No the bugs aren't scary. I was scared because you were outside and I didn't know where you were"
"Oh"
"You can't go outside when it's dark and you can't go to the front yard unless you are holding momma or daddy's hand."
"It's scary?"
"Outside isn't scary but it's scary for me when I don't know your out there."
"ok"

It was so hard to try and make him understand how serious the situation was with out A) making him think he was in trouble and B) making him think outside was scary.

I told James I'm going to go buy one of those childproof handles for the door today.
I wish I could bottle this feeling up so anytime I find myself getting exasperated with him I can open up the bottle and remember how scared I was and how happy I was that he was okay.

Whew! What a crappy way to start your day at 5:30am!