Thursday, July 2, 2009

What a scare!

This morning I had the biggest scare of my life (up to date).

Every morning before Jeramyah crawls into bed with me I wake up to the sound of his little feet running across the house to our room. Well this morning when I heard it I looked at the clock and then noticed the bathroom light was still on (from James getting ready for work) so after a minute of not feeling J come to bed I thought maybe James was running late and he was just stomping through the house. I close my eyes for a minute and something makes me get up.

I walk into the living room and notice the front door is open about a foot. I walk to it and say Jeramyah's name. I notice a lady walking across the street so I turn around to go get some pants (I'm just in a tshirt) I take the extra few steps across the hall to see if J's in his bed and if maybe James left the door open while starting his car. I don't see J so I panic I turn around to get pants and go check outside when I see J standing at the door.

The poor kid is crying and shaking so hard! When he sees me he runs to me and I pick him up, I have NEVER felt that child hold on to me so closely. I set down with him and ask him why he was outside and he can't even talk he's crying so hard. I have never seen him this way. I finally get a broken sentence out of him between hiccups and cries "daddy can't go to work".

I tell him "Yes, daddy went to work. Why were you outside?"
"The bugs were getting me." (again between hiccups and crying)
"Baby you can't go outside unless momma or daddy is with you"
More heavy crying.

I finally get him calmed down so I call James and leave him a message telling him what happened and that we need to keep an eye on him more and make sure we always lock the door. I then get J something to drink and change his diaper. I pull him close and we snuggle in bed with the light on for a bit. James calls about that time and I tell him again what all happened (in a bit more detail).

I had been scared but I didn't loose my cool up until this point. I guess saying it out loud to James I realized exactly what all could have happened. I start crying so hard. We talk for a bit then I let J talk to him for a minute. When I get off the phone Jeramyah asks "You scared?"
"Yes baby"
"About what?" I take just a second to think on how to word this and he says "The bugs scary?" About this time tears start to well up in his eyes again.
"No the bugs aren't scary. I was scared because you were outside and I didn't know where you were"
"Oh"
"You can't go outside when it's dark and you can't go to the front yard unless you are holding momma or daddy's hand."
"It's scary?"
"Outside isn't scary but it's scary for me when I don't know your out there."
"ok"

It was so hard to try and make him understand how serious the situation was with out A) making him think he was in trouble and B) making him think outside was scary.

I told James I'm going to go buy one of those childproof handles for the door today.
I wish I could bottle this feeling up so anytime I find myself getting exasperated with him I can open up the bottle and remember how scared I was and how happy I was that he was okay.

Whew! What a crappy way to start your day at 5:30am!

2 comments:

tadsmama said...

they have those little alarms that they advertise on tv. I got some at walmart when Alyssa was that age. She would sneak out back all the time and that's when we lived out in the country. I was afraid of the snakes!
Anyway, it was a pack of 4 for like $10. The sticky wore off quick and I replaced them often, but it was worth my sanity to know every time that door opened.

Erica said...

OMG..i so sorry you had to go through that especially when you are already emotionally from the baby. By the way I was crying when i read this entry and thinking about how you were feeling! I am glad everything turned out ok :)